Christmas is all about family, food and drink. Usually I love Christmas but, over the last two years I have struggled. Christmas makes my desire for a family even more intense, it reminds me of what we can't have and I am beginning to hate that it is just the two of us.
It will be our third Christmas since we started to try for a baby. Last Christmas I was depressed, I had piled on nearly two stone and Christmas was just a heavy reminder that another year had passed and still no baby. As December approached this year I found myself slipping into the same mood as last, it was starting to get to me and, to be honest with you, I was starting to dread Christmas again.
That is, until, our holiday, our break from everything. Suddenly I am loving Christmas. I have an advent calendar and an advent candle and decorations have slowly been making their way into our lounge.
Last night my Christmas mood was threatened slightly as I started to write our Christmas cards. I suddenly thought about the fact that many of our friends have additional names on their Christmas cards whilst I am still signing off from just the two of us. Why is it the small things when you are most unaware? I made a conscious decision that I was not going to let such a small insignificant thing totally strip me of my joyous Christmas mood.
I am happy and I am looking forward to Christmas.
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The secret diary of an infertile
- Secret D
- Growing bored of this IF malarky and I am only just getting started....
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6 comments:
1) You are writing Christmas cards already? Gah! (Actually I never get round to sending any so I should just accept that now)
2)Yeah, it is tough, but we will get there. Really.
It hurts. But everytime something like this hurts I tell myself 'This too shall pass. It is only a matter of time'. You have your lap scheduled..you are making progress. Here's a fond Christmas wish for you to get preggo after a successful lap! Take care
Hi..btw..am waiting for my RE appointment post my GP referral. How long does it take? Do I need to follow up with somebody? I was told to wait for 3 weeks and it is already 2.5 weeks. Also, at what point does an RE suggest a HSG. Should I ask for it? I am new to the NHS and it would be of great help if you could guide me. Thanks.
HH - I was surprised at how quick we got our initial appointment following our GP referral. We received a letter about three weeks after our referral with an appointment for the following month.
The HSG was the first thing that was offered to me and the appointment for that came about a week after the initial consultation and was scheduled for about three weeks after the letter arrived.
The problem with the NHS is that it varies depending on where you live. I know that a neighbouring county performs laparoscopies before HSGs (which I find a bit bizarre).
I would call your doctor if you don't hear anything after 4 weeks, they have told you to wait 3 so it would be fair to chase after 4. You don't want them to forget about you (which is what happened to me).
I have been amazed at how quick all my appointments have been - referred in August, initial appointment in September, HSG in October, 2nd appointment in November and laparoscopy in December! I feel very lucky because I know that other people have waited a lot longer.
Fingers crossed that you live in one of the better areas.
Thanks..this info surely helps..I am at Taunton and the timelines are reasonable here. All the best once again for your lap.
I'm in the same place as you, although not as excited yet. Year one, liked Christmas cuz NEXT Christmas could have the 3 of us! Year two, hated Christmas. It was evil. Pure evil. Year 3, well, what the hell, may as well get into it:-)
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